It’s just too dang hot outside! This heat here in Miami has been brutal, which leaves me no recourse than to sweat like a whore in church and wear jhorts (AKA jean shorts). My one rule for those of you who sport jhorts? NO BUTT CHEEKS PEEPING OUT FROM THE BACK, PLEASE. That’s number #2 on my pet peeve list — right after having to pump my own gas.
Butt cheek reveals are best left for the bedroom, ladies.
Anyhoo, I survived modeling in the Splashion fashion last Tuesday night. It was absolutely terrifying and I contemplated guzzling a bottle of Klonopin beforehand, but I got my shit together and did the damn thang. Often times, I let my running thoughts (Will I trip? Does my ass look huge? Am I missing a phenomenal episode of Dateline right now? Do aliens exist on Mars? Will Tumeric supplements make me saner? Is Jennifer Aniston actually pregnant?) get the best of me but I managed to place one foot in front of the other on the catwalk without error. Phew!
Amazing illustration by Kara Ashley Shreeve — thanks, Kara!